Could
be I had a mini-stroke
or parts of
the brain gave up working
a result of over/underuse.
I lost an
hour.
Christmas
two days away
a baked
cookie beach, sunshine glaze.
Surf folded
like giftwrap as
Santa leant
out of the rescue helicopter
waved to the
kiddies on the sand.
Inexplicably I waved back.
Living with Silly is harder than ballroom dancing
but less
exhausting than Worry.
THAT
roommate I’ve harboured all these years, he
made a mess
never paid a cent
took up
space
as if that
alone was a reasonable contribution.
Could be
this is an idiot wisdom — heading home
I nod to a
passing eucalypt.
older than
me, we both share a scowl
at some
upstart shrubs.
On the
tinsel day I plan to walk to the family
burdened by
sugar, love & flagrant paper.
Grandchildren will tear up everything with their laughter
as armistice
leaks from each corner.
The wine, I
swear, will croon.
With just a
tinge of jealousy we’ll watch
toddlers
head off to afternoon naps.
The golden
retriever
won’t even
raise her head.
At 17
I told my father
Come the
revolution you’ll be the first person I shoot.
Self-medicating, the narcotics of change
a life goal
to ditch the suburbs —
achieved 12
months later, what then?
Drugs
eventually gave me up
though I
still like the music. Bloody cigarettes.
Some
sensations are stronger than ever
is this
normal? I’d have thought
it would be
publicised somewhere as we all
turn down
that dirt track to decay.
At 17, in
just 5 minutes, I could fall in love
with the
wild teenage escapee from the convent school.
Her Indian
cotton, that deluge of laughter
caroming in
a few days loose.
How can I
find out
if she grew
up to become a defendant
or the judge
who handed out sentences?
To believe
in social justice
or your
friends
when you
don’t believe in belief.
I’m riding
something
& hope this
cart is not just
reinforcing
the ruts in a
woeful path.
I’m 69,
today pass
nothing more interesting
than refuse
& drear
(though
there’s still some glitter
deep in the
rickle).
Marched
against most wars
even when it
was just me & 24 Indonesians.
20 years in
the union movement
didn’t
overcome
but we
tried.
Some say
never look back.
How can you
look forward if you don’t?
Occasionally
think worry is just an indulgence.
I get emails
from Ukraine
read about
Gaza.
Can’t “pick
a side” in Africa so
visit a
friend in hospital
lost 26
inches of bowel
she loves
the meds remember when…
At 17
surrender was not an option.
Nothing’s
changed.